I'm in phone call limbo hell right now, but, I had a few minutes to get these guys cleaned up for everybody. They deserve a little better than chicken scratch sketches I made between county FOIA requests.
Thank fellow backers TwinkieStarr and Kim Lackey for these ones - the Aussie and shar pei have joined the DOG CRIMES roster!
Sometimes one of you guys buys a sponsor tier, and immediately calms any nerves I have because your idea is genuinely so fucking good. Let me tell you, I haven't felt the sheer, juvenile joy that "can you draw shar pei wrinkles in the CRIMES style" gave me, in ages. Probably since the weed skunk, honestly.
Sorry to the Aussie enjoyers, your calculating dinner-stealer is cute too. But this wrinkled beast... he's perfect.
If you're new to the HUSTLE, sponsors pay the full cost of a pin up-front. They get 10, and they make it available for every other backer to buy, too. You can add the EMBEZZLEMENT AUSSIE and RESISTING ARREST SHAR PEI to your pledge at any time - they are guaranteed for production!
If you'd like to get YOUR breed of choice convicted, there is one more CREATE A CRIMINAL spot for this campaign.
So, these two bad boys are guaranteed. With eight days left, where are we standing?
MUGSHOTS 2" stickers will unlock at $5,500... well, they were going to. I'm actually going to go turn these on, anyway. If you want to get MUGSHOTS, they are available as addons for all unlocked designs. Go get your damn stickers, I know you guys love 'em.
The CONSPIRACY POODLE unlocks at $5.9k. We're not too far off, and I expect to get here, even if it's just in the last 48 hours.
The ATTEMPTED MURDER chihuahua unlocks at $6.7k.
The SPEEDING GREYHOUND unlocks at $8k.
Our DOG CRIMES final stretch goal is a backer vote at $9k.
Now, let's be real. I'm used to my campaigns doing a few more numbers than this. I ain't mad, it's mid year, we launched mid week, and the world is functionally on fire right now. However, I would love DOG CRIMES to not be my lowest funding campaign ever.
We missed the backer vote tier because of funding issues on CHALLENGE COIN CRITTERS. But, substantially lower down in the funding journey, I think we can reach $9k this time.
I want to hear YOUR IDEAS for our $9k backer vote dogs.
I will add the funniest and most fitting options to a poll at the 5-day mark of the campaign. Then, it's up to you and your filthy, horrible peers to figure out who's gonna come out top dog.
I want YOU to comment with:
A purebred dog and crime.
No doodles, designer breeds, or wild dogs. Don't worry... they'll get their turn soon. :)
Try not to repeat crimes that are already used - dupes from BIRD CRIMES or CRITTER CRIMES are fine!
Make it an actual crime - don't go gentle.
Make me laugh. Or make me groan real loud. Either way, give me something to react to after I finish C3's domestic fulfillment tonight. I'll see you around.
